Ninja Alpacas.

There are two people in Portland who everygirl wants to get with one is our hero Paddy, the other is the local leader of the clan of ninja alpacas. When the alpaca's learnt that Paddy met a girl they decided that she had to die. What they failed to realise was Heidi had earned the legendary pink and purple polka dot belt in the martial art pocuinthegut. Portland is now patroled by ostrich gangs due to the lack of ninja alpacas to patrol it and somehow a blue whale fell into the pub and Heidi is a local hero.